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Wednesday 21 May 2008

Help Lord, PLEASE-- a prayer and update

I'm in so much pain physically and emotionally, I can't bear it, and can't get help for it. I keep begging you Lord to guide me to know what to do to get feeling better, and to help me do it, but I am not getting the message. Maybe because the pain is louder than your "Still small voice" that guides us? Too much stress in too short of a time. Too long for me to detail everything that happened just this month and I don't have the strength. I spend almost every waking moment in prayer or in researching how to get better, since the doctors don't want to treat me and since all I get from them is abuse anyway. Naturopathic medicine is not abusive and not toxic like prescriptions, but VERY expensive, and there are thousands of treatments. Don't know where to start. Can't even think. I feel like I'm running out of life like a battery or cell phone slowly running out of energy...I hope I can find something to "recharge" me soon, or I fear the misery I will be in. I don't fear death, just fear more suffering. I can't even put on an act of positivity right now. I don't have the strength or the clear mind to do it. How can a person suffer so much and not go unconscious? If Satan is trying to get me to forsake you, like he tried with Job, he is wasting his time. I will never deny you or your love. Thankyou for sending all my earth angel friends who help me again and again when I can't think for myself. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

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