Monday, 11 July 2011


Chameleons are so amazing. If you go to youtube and look at videos of them, they can hide in front of things that have many colors, even patterned fabric. They have been created with natural ability to adapt to every circumstance. The camoflage is for their protection.

Humans seem to have been able to adapt to so many changes of climate and lifestyle and disaster and change in income, change in family size when new babies come. It seems that one of the few things a body never adapts to, or get used to, is pain. I have had worsening pain since age 15. If a person lives that long with almost any other situation, they would adapt to that. Why do our bodies never adjust to pain? There are so many other health problems that come with long-term pain, which create more things to adjust to, while becoming more physically weakened, with less ability to be strong enough to adjust.

I have studies natural remedies for all my conditions, but now I need to study natural remedies for Multiple Sclerosis.

My mind and body is changing so fast, it's frightening. Things that used to take me 1 hour to write or do, now take 3 hours, and I don't have the strength to do much of anything. 10 constant symptoms at once while trying to do everything for Mom makes me spend progressively more time doubled up in pain every day. Like I said in post below, that has benefits for Mom, but I am not adjusting to this!

If any of you can find any uplifting thoughts or scriptures about adapting to unbearable circumstances, I would appreciate reading them so very much.


Tuesday, 5 July 2011

A Benefit from Frustrations

Hello my friends. About 2 days ago, I noticed that during the number of hours that I can't move or think or talk, my Mom gets up more, and gets her own ice and drinks. My periods of uselessness help her to slowly increase her strength, and since my down hours are progressively increasing, her strength is also progressively increasing

It frustrates me that with my fibrofog, and forgetting due to trigeminal neuralgia attacks, that I have to keep reminding myself of the encouragement from the scriptures. I should remember these things! I guess that's why the Lord sent me such wise and patient
friends to remind me. Thank you all.


Friday, 1 July 2011


Today would also be Princess Diana's 50th birthday. There is a very nice article and pictures commemorating her life @ http://bit.ly/lb9EES. Some people have said I looked like her sister as a teenager. Pic on left is me @ age 16.

Susie D. I'm not sure if you know how blogs work yet, but if you click on "3 comments" under the Wheelchair fiasco story, you will see where I replied to you. I will also reply to your kind words @ http://www.lifewithlupus.org/ . (Yes that WAS a plug for anyone with lupus. Great support group.) There needs to be a support group for people with multiple illnesses, because when we are suffering but don't know which disease is causing the problem, we just avoid them all. Some of what I wrote to you will be used in this update.

I kind of shocked myself to see that I have not posted for a week, when so much has happened each day. Since Mom came home, (June 20) I have been so rushed off my feet, or else crashing in pain, so I have not had the concentration or strength to think of what to say here. Today I am stuck in bed pretty much, except for a couple of crises that came up and needed my help, and doing laundry. Even on days I can barely move, urgent things happen or need doing.

The nurse came for her half hour this week. She will come again on Tuesday, as will the high school girl I hired for some housework and errands. So I am thankful for what little time they can spare, until my housekeeper finds a full time job, then we will go back to searching for an honest lady, which has taken up to 5 years at a time. I LOVE HELPING PEOPLE and that includes my mom, whom I respect and love dearly, but how i wish I felt better so I could do a better job.

I feel very weak because I complain a lot, which is a type of a cry for prayers and support, because I feel so alone physically in all this. I know I am being carried some, because if I used only my own strength, I'd be bedridden. I'm one step up from that, kind of like a zombie. lol. I complain because I don't handle all of this well at all. So many say I'm so strong, but I just see the things I am not getting done. Last night needed to go to the hospital again for pain and heart trouble. I am pushing myself past my limits every hour, then by 4 PM I a crash, not able to move or get either of us something to eat or drink. I take some meds and then by 9 or 10 I can help with a drink or soft food for Mom, and something light for myself. I just roll in pain when I crash, and I pray continually all day. It just feels like Satan trying to counteract everyone's prayers by creating another crisis every hour. Things that never happened before are hitting us all at once. Adds greatly to the hardship.

I AM thankful for all my blessings, but without strength to meet your needs each hour, all the luxury on earth is worthless. About every 3rd or 4th day I spend the day in a semi-conscious state. (part of lupus and diabetes). I told the Dr. my whole new set of symptoms, and he checked my records and said "Well, looks like you are having your first flare-up of Multiple Sclerosis." Oh great. As if I need that on top of everything else. It made me realize why so many local people, even church people, don't want to be our friends. I can see them saying "It's impossible for one person to have that many diseases!" I can hardly believe it myself, and I live with them, so how could others believe it? Did you know Job, in the Bible, only suffered for 5 months? That seems to barely compare to people who suffer for 50 years or more. I was hoping all this extra physical activity would help me lose weight and make me healthier, but I gained water/fluid weight due to heart failure/damage, and I'm getting worse every day, not more healthy. One good thing about this is that I don't even have the strength to worry about tomorrow, because I'm just concentrating on what needs to be done in the next hour, then just collapse instead of relax. Wow, I have spent almost 12 hours writing this in between keeping busy and crashing.

Thanks all for being patient with me. I think if I had even one local friend or a spouse to talk and help, maybe I wouldn't seek prayers and support so much online.

Bless you all,


P.S. Please pray for a friend (Pia Go-Alano) and her father. They flew to China for her father's cancer treatment, because this one hospital has such a

high success rate. You can read her daily updates @ www.piasjournal.com .

Is anyone else on blogspot having trouble with spacing? I have now tried 5 times to move all the paragraphs closer to each other and save them that way, but when I "view blog", they are always far apart from each other again.

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