Friday, 28 November 2008

I thought you might like these

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  1. Thou shall not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all human activities.
  2. Thou shall not be fearful, for most of the things we fear never come to pass.
  3. Thou shall not cross bridges before you come to them, for no one yet has succeeded in accomplishing this.
  4. Thou shall face each problem as it comes. You can only handle one at a time anyway.
  5. Thou shall not take problems to bed with you, for they make very poor bedfellows.
  6. Thou shall not borrow other people's problems. They can better care for them than you can.
  7. Thou shall not try to relive yesterday for good or ill, it is forever gone. Concentrate on what is happening in your life and be happy now!
  8. Thou shall be a good listener, for only when you listen do you hear ideas different from your own. It is hard to learn something new when you are talking, and some people do know more than you do.
  9. Thou shall not become "bogged down" by frustration, for 90% of it is rooted in self-pity and will only interfere with positive action.
  10. Thou shall count thy blessings, never overlooking the small ones, for a lot of small blessings add up to big ones.

Thursday, 27 November 2008

Just being silly.

Wednesday, 26 November 2008



Oh dang! The tigger up above us supposed to be animated and his tongue is hanging out and swinging back and forth like he just tasted something awful. Too bad animated pictures work in the side bar but not in the main blog!

I was told the flu of last year and this year is an especially tough one, making people much sicker for much longer. Mom and I both have it. She got over it in a week so I am hoping that will happen to me too. It's day 4 for me, but feels like it's down in my lungs already. Stupid temperature is 104f (40 c) even with the fever medicine. I remember reading that chicken soup made with real chicken, not artificial flavoring, has anti-viral and antibiotic properties and has saved whole towns during flu epidemics, so I am living on that. I'm sure it will pass, because of all my dear friends praying for me. It's just yucky for a few days. WASH YOUR HANDS A LOT--AVOID THIS YEAR'S FLU...ITS A ROUGH ONE!


Friday, 21 November 2008

More on Inner Strength

So to carry this thought 1 step further (see 2 posts below "Inner Strength")
SINCE...there is no other way to develop this inner strength except for the continuous battle of chronic pain and illness,
COULD IT BE....that certain people in this generation have been given these weird new illnesses, (mostly due to environmental toxins, such as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Fibromyalgia, Multiple Chemical Sensitivity, Lupus, Gulf War Syndrome, and any undiagnosed and/or auto-immune disease that goes through the whole system of the body)
in order to strengthen us for the worst part of the last days?? 
    Another thought is this. The only thing we take with us is what we learn and our relationships. So those of us who have learned this inner strength will be a little bit ahead after the resurrection, and may be called upon to be teachers, guides, missionaries, counselors, leaders to those who did not have the opportunity to learn what we learned through constant pain.
Just my humble opinion.

Thursday, 20 November 2008

A Bit of Excitement!

Today, my younger daughter, Tina, was named "Mrs. Western Idaho"! She will be in the Thanksgiving Parade in Boise Idaho, then will go on to the Mrs. Idaho pageant in April, and possibly on to Mrs. America and Mrs. World. Here is the website about the pageant. http://www.mrsidahoamerica.com/ It seems a bit odd. I thought my girls and I were cute, and "not ugly", but I have never thought of any of us as gorgeous or beautiful, even when each of us modeled, and even my grandsons have modeled and been in magazines. I just can't see it. I guess I look for deeper traits than outside beauty. My girls are pretty enough to have made their parents worry during their single years, for sure...so I should have known then, that they are great looking. I never understood the benefits of being too pretty, since I was hassled by men so much. Anyway, I digress. It will be a great experience for my daughter. If you want to meet her and her family, her blog is at http://coreytinaandboys.blogspot.com/. Tina was 2 months premature, and was only 3 lbs. and a few ounces at birth. Here is a picture of her sitting in a baseball glove when she is about 6 weeks old, so she was much smaller when she was born.

This is my older daughter, Crystal, 2 years older than Tina. I am just as proud of her life and and accomplishments. She has experienced so much, so young, and come through cheerful and optimistic at every turn. She is a great lady. The girls are so opposite, so different, so I love different things in each of them. Crystal doesn't blog, but one of her budding businesses is a speed-dating business which will be great in the college town she lives in. The website is not complete yet but the beginning is http://www.icebreakers101.com/.

Here they are together with each of their 2 boys:

We are all writers. Both girls and myself are writing books, and my brother got his book published in June. It is an encyclopedia of healing herbs and foods and natural remedies. It took 8 hours a day for 11 years to write it and take all the pictures out in the fields, and when it got published, it was 4 large books, each too expensive for the general public, so we are also offering it on e-book and CD-Rom. If you look up any symptom, every natural remedy (from North America) will show up. If you type in any herb or food or plant, a picture of the item and all of the health problems it is used for pops up. You can see that at: http://tinyurl.com/2lw2yy
If you have been watching the news in the past few hours, about 5 hours ago, a fireball fell to the earth not far from my city. It was as big as a house, and it is being reported internationally. It was a meteorite, and landed just S.E. of Calgary Alberta almost on the border of Saskatchewan. I don't have pictures or video yet, it is too new, but it was exciting, lots of people saw it and wondered where it would land. Thank goodness it landed out in the country, not in the middle of a city. It reminds me of Superman who landed on earth that way. Did you know the Superman creator was Canadian? Did you know the movies and the series were filmed in Alberta, Canada? And now a meteorite HAS landed in Alberta. Think there's a superman in there? HAHAHA ROFL There will be lots of people driving to the crash site to see the deep crater it made. Might be a nice day trip, maybe we'll go too. (see
http://www.ctvnews.ca for more about the fireball).

I had to take Mom to the E.R. and it was a great and speedy experience, with our favorite Dr. attending, when she was told she would be getting a different Dr., one we wish would disappear....so it was a great day!

Its so nice to be able to have someone to share my excitement and good times with, as well as my struggles.


Inner Strength

A new member of my fibromyalgia support group said something that was profound. It does not only pertain to those with fibromyalgia, but all who have chronic pain and have kept their faith. She said,
"Hello Guys! I'm back!
     I'm feeling better - and I didn't kill anyone with this flare up - can you believe it!!
     I've been reading the daily digest - you guys are amazing! Staying positive, giving advice, not getting irritated - congrats!
     I really think we have Fibro to show the world how strong you really can be. People without Fibro doesn't have that "inner power" we do - we cope with life, pain, rejection and heck knows what else and we
stay positive, we help others ... in a way Fibro makes us stronger.
    I hope to chat to you guys soon - I'll be checking my email every few minutes!"

     Its very hard for people who are struggling with pain and not able to accomplish the basics, to think of themselves as strong, but this friend is right. Even though we are limited, and feel useless, we have an inner strength that we might never have gotten in any other way. Every cloud, no matter how long lasting and how destructive, does have a silver lining, but it often takes years to see any benefits of the suffering. There is always a purpose for everything.

Tuesday, 18 November 2008

Finding the benefit in trials.

They say that every gray cloud has a silver lining. There is also a scripture that says that ALL things work for good for those who love the Lord. ALL things, no matter how terrible. What an awesome feeling. Therefore, I have been trying to think of the good things that come out of tough situations. Even though I am confused about why God would finally drop this "cure" into my life, and then kind of take it away, because it caused a lupus flare, there have been benefits. At least 4 of my family, 4 of my friends, and quite a few blog readers have had their lives changed by D-ribose, so I feel as if I did help someone in this life, even from my bed! Each trial is just another lesson to learn. The pain that comes from a stress or crisis are only growing pains. Pains of change, stretching, exercising parts of your mind and spirit that you didn't know you had in you. I had to stop looking at each crisis as "Oh no, I can't take this stress anymore" and had to start thinking "Ok, so here we have another opportunity to learn something in order to grow and to help others, and I have help, the Lord promised to never forsake me or leave me."

I am feeling human again thanks to very low doses of prednisone, the lupus medicine I usually avoid like I'd avoid a poisonous snake, but even snake venom has some medicinal properties when used wisely.

It was my husband's and my third anniversary on the 15th, and still no honeymoon, but the legal papers are all in now, and I hope that's the end of the paperwork. Now we will get our day in court to present our case as to why to get my husband here from the war zone. Its in the Lord's hands now. I have pros and cons in mind for both situations, whether we win or lose. Whatever is God's will, I will accept and will know it is for my own good and part of my "mission" here on earth. I will still be in mourning if the Lord says "no" about us getting together, but I'll do whatever the Lord wants me to.


Tuesday, 11 November 2008

Frustrated and Speechless-(sort of)

It's hard to think of myself as being rendered speechless, but I was. I had something I wanted to share, but after such wonderful things were said about me in that review and in the many comments after the review, I wondered if I dared post what was happening now, in case it might change everyone's view of me...but I started this blog planning to show the good and the bad in my life, so that when I am healed, people will know it was real, so I guess I'd better open up and be honest.

Mel very generously overestimated me. I am not the wise (spiritually) person that I think he sees me as. I get lost and frustrated and confused just like everyone else. Now is one of these times.

When I felt so changed with that nutritional supplement, (d-ribose), I thought God had given me a miracle, a healing. I accepted completely that I was healed, and I had gotten a miracle. I thanked Him so many times a day, and after a cautious waiting period to make sure it was not temporary, I got the courage to share my miracle with others, and they also praised God for it, for my healing and for the hope that they might get a miracle too. I hope they do, but people with lupus or other severe auto-immune disease might have a bad reaction. I say might, because maybe mine is an isolated case. I don't know.
I thought my loving Heavenly Father had finally rewarded me, like He rewarded Job after Job losing everything and suffering so much. I thought I was going to get the chance to be functional again, and feel alive and experience joy again, but it didn't last long. I am thankful for the memory of how life felt during that time, though.

I had to stop taking the D-ribose. It appears that it is so good for you, that it even strengthens your immune system. Well for a person with lupus, that can be fatal, because already our immune system is too strong, and the fighter cells attack our bodies and organs as if they are germs or foreign objects in our body. We can't even spend time in the sun, because the sun also strengthens your immune system, making lupus worse. I got so sick that for a few days I wasn't able to roll over in bed to reply to my emails, but I could read them, and was too weak to talk, or to hold up a book to read. I had a seizure, and another time, I think I got very close to death again, because I saw some of the things that I have seen during other near death experiences. I saw some wonderful things, but things that I have no words for, so I don't know how to explain it to people. I am still spending a lot of time thinking about those images and
trying to think of how to describe them.

There is a medicine used for lupus, (cortisone) and it's very strong and has such terrible side affects that I always said I would rather die of lupus than die of the side affects of that medicine. I have only been desperate enough to try it about 3 times in my life. I prayed for guidance about how to get feeling better. Obviously it's not my time to die, and I could not just lay there helpless forever. The impression I got was to take that medicine. I didn't want to do it. I called Mom upstairs and asked her advice. She has that medicine because she also has lupus. It suppresses the immune system so the fighter cells in your blood stop attacking you, and helps with any swelling or inflammation in the body. I spent days passing out and trying to do this US gov't proofreading project during the moments I was awake. I had pancreatitis, inflammation of the pancreas, and it has many nasty symptoms. The worst was that I kept passing out from my blood sugar going too high or too low because my pancreas was out of control. Mom said that the side affects of that medicine only come with large doses and long term use, but when I talked to my Dr. , she talked about large doses like 10 pills a day, or even put me in the hospital with cortisone IV, but said she didn't trust this hospital much, we are not even checked on often enough during the day while in this hospital. I didn't want the side affects from doing that, so I took a few pills and cut them into 4, and during the day would take one tiny piece of the pill, with a bite of food so I wouldn't get sicker. This is the third day of doing that, and finally many symptoms have lessened, I feel strong enough to type again, but not strong enough to get in the shower yet. So I am thankful now for this strong medicine with horrible side affects, in small doses, BUT...

I am wondering
I accepted that healing! I thanked the Lord SO many times a day for it. I told others about my healing and my miracle and they also praised the Lord about it! I was convinced I had been given another chance at life, to have enough strength to enjoy life or to function a bit more than I do.

I know I will learn in time the reason why God took my healing away....but until I learn that, my feelings are hurt like a child whose parents did something that hurt the child, but was for the child's own good. I feel a bit betrayed and confused by the one who I love the most...my Heavenly Father.

I am so frustrated, I use my made-up word "FRUSTIPATED!!"---beyond frustration! So frustrated, that I am not able to accomplish anything else until this problem clears itself up. I have so much that needs doing urgently, and can't even find anyone to hire to help. I can't have anyone come live with me when I am in this condition, so I get upset thinking about my husband coming home. I can't bear the thought of making life hard or even miserable for him.

Interesting that the worst of my illness happened the day that I finished all the legal paperwork to go to court to get my husband here, 5 years of work, 1800 pages done in the last 5 days of work.

OH MY STARS!! I just noticed something!! I have had this picture as stationary for years, but the stationary had this as small pictures down the left side of the paper. I thought of putting it here because it reminds me of how I feel, looking out the window, trying to figure out "WHY??" Now I see this picture in a whole new light. I have never seen the wolf outside the window. Did you know "lupus" means WOLF? She is not looking out the window, she is turned away from the wolf, from the lupus. The dove in the corner, the symbol of the Holy Spirit, is watching over the lady! The wolf is standing in water, and that water is flowing into the window, and the woman's feet are in the water, so the effects of the wolf (the lupus) is affecting the woman. The light above the woman's head, I wonder what it's symbolism is. Light...spirit? knowledge? God? Any ideas from you, my friends? What do you think that light could symbolize in the picture and in how it could relate to me and the wolf (lupus) and my sitting by the window thinking? Any other symbols you would comment on? The moon, the fact the lady is wearing all white? The water? Whatever it is in the lower 1/4 left side of the picture? Maybe your insight will give me some insight.

Love you all---u r pieces of my life and heart.

Oh, I need to add:
This is Remembrance Day here:
The day we remember and honor our veterans
the day WWII ended
11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month.
Out of respect for all of our veterans form everywhere:

Support Our Troops

Thursday, 6 November 2008

I am SOOOO humbled!!! *tears*

A very kind, spiritual blogger friend reads my blog and has reviewed it...look what he said about it. I can hardly believe he said such wonderful things!! Maybe he is my fan club. The only one I will ever have. lol. Go here:


Thank you Mel for your giant heart, and thank you Lord for my online friends! I think YOU are the master of blogs, being able to handle so many, to make them all so artistic, to reach out to so many souls, and to continue to uplift them as friends. I pray you will be blessed for all the lives you bless.



P.S. His blog mentions that he will review yours too if you ask.

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