After the test of your faith...
"After the test of your faith,
THEN cometh the reward!"
I thought that was a scripture, but after looking it up, I can't find it anywhere, so I don't know where it comes from but I have heard it all my life, and today it's true.
I've been looking for a new Dr. for a couple of years, as my Dr. is gone 6 months a year and only works 2 afternoons a week because he's recovering from cancer, and he doesn't have hospital privileges if I get really sick. I had been through the mill, going to 17 doctors who all decided to yell at me, insult me, within the first 2 minutes of our meeting, as soon as they learned I was being treated for severe, intractable pain. They all blamed me for seeking for drugs, instead of looking at me as a person in severe pain, who had been MORE than careful with any pain medicine I had been given, and actually take much less than I am told to take.
Well, today was an appointment with another Dr... so I prayed for strength for the coming abuse, and had thought about it for the 2 months that this appointment had been set up for. I was especially afraid because the only woman doctors I had ever met were VERY tough and mean, maybe because they had to be that way to get through a medical school full of only men. That was many years ago that I met those woman doctors though, and I'm sure there are a lot more women in medical school now, thank heaven.
All weekend I had such a wonderful, peaceful, spirit filled time, full of whisperings from the Holy Spirit, and guidance, and comfort, and insights. It was WONDERFUL and so I asked the Lord to please let it carry on into today, and for Him to carry me through today, no matter what I had to face. I really doubted if I could go through 10+ more doctors' abuse, and I think the Lord knew it. It has started to affect me like being abused again and again by a spouse, but I can't divorce this abuse, because I can't divorce my condition. I have a condition that a Dr. needs to take care of...and most of them in this country are impatient and uncompassionate about chronic illness.
Anyway, I digress...THE GOOD NEWS IS....
This doctor was so wonderful I could have broken down in tears of relief right in her office, but I was too happy to cry. She is the sweetest, small town girl who became a Dr. and is VERY good because she had to treat every condition while working for years in a small town. She doesn't have a problem with treating my pain or multiple other conditions at all, like others who told me they can't handle more than one symptom at a time! She's so kind, I think I'll ask mom to also go to her. Mom's Dr. is the same as mine. I am so very humbly thankful to Him for this gift/miracle.
Miracle #2. I had heard that one grocery store delivered. I called and they said yes they deliver if you come pick out your food first. I said that Mom and I were homebound and couldn't come in, is there anyone who would be willing to shop for us, then they could deliver? She put me on hold, talked to the supervisor, then came back and said "Give us your names. We've decided that for you two, we will do the shopping and delivering. Just ask for the manager and tell him your name and remind him of our arrangement." SO NOW WE HAVE HELP TO GET GROCERIES! We don't eat much, but it shopping has been a job too big for either of us.
I HAVE A LOT OF THANKING THE LORD TO DO NOW! JUST WANTED TO SHARE!
Blessings,
Bluebirdy
Bluebirdy
I Googled the phrase you had sent me in your email, and the 1st listing was for your site. Imagine that!!
One thing I found was: "Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you (Matthew 5.11,12)."
To me this passage gives meaning to some of the things you've been through.
As for the food, here we have grocery stores that allow you to order online and them they will deliver it to you.
Then there are 'Meals on Wheels' which I get, and it is brought to me five days a week. I get a well balanced hot meal from them, so I only have to fix something on weekends and holidays.
Luv and blessings,
Helen
Anonymous said... Wed Sept 03, 12:42:00 pm GMT-6
Oh my friend, you have been abused too long by your uncaring doctors that you finally found a sweet doctor that treats you well. After so many trials, relief feels so good. The arrangement made for you at the grocery was such that you are relieved of the hassles of buying for your immediate needs. Such are the small rewards of lingering in pain and suffering but still trusting in the goodness and mercy of the Lord. You relish each small blessings that come your way. I honestly feel you deserve more humane treatment, compassion and tenderness from your doctors. Shame on them for showering you with abuses and maltreatment. May the Lord forgive them for their meanness. Thanks for the post my friend. God bless you always. You are always in my prayers.
Mel Avila Alarilla said... Wed Sept 03, 05:40:00 pm GMT-6
Thanks Dear Angel Mel;
I am just amazed how wonderful today has been. My hopelessness is gone. My fear of no relief no matter how severely ill I get, is gone. The relief to know that maybe after all these years I have learned what I needed to learn from the abuse and no one to help, and now I am being told I can end that "lesson" and move on to another lesson, and be blessed with someone who will help me, it's just such a lift of weight off my shoulders and spirit. I know the E.R will still be an abusive place, but I have a back-up now if I can get them to call my new Dr.
You are in my prayers always too Mel.
Blessings,
Sheila
Bluebirdy said... Wed Sept 03, 05:54:00 pm GMT-6
Small little pockets of miracle brighten up our seemingly dark paths time to time. I can feel your relief, about the grocery and the new doc. I totally hear you. I have bad times and every trip out of my house is not something I take for granted too. It seems that those who suffer more can empathize with another more easily. I am so happy for the rays of sunshine and hope you've just had. I hope your mom will finally get the respect she deserves too.
I am surprised that so many doctors are so abusive. I had a lady professor treating me once. All the hospital staffs are scared of her. Both good and bad. Because it means that no one dares to touch/assist her patients without her consent.
mistipurple said... Thu Sept 04, 12:24:00 pm GMT-6
Hi Sheila,
God bless every moment in your life.
Thank you for sharing!
I wish you much blessing miracles!
Do you know that you are my inspiration?
Your faith is your power.
And my power too.
MARIA said... Sat Sept 06, 02:57:00 pm GMT-6
Oh Maria...you make me feel so humble. I don't know how a person like me can be inspiration to someone like you who has much wisdom and experience, but you are very kind to say so! Bless you Maria!
Sheila
Bluebirdy said... Sat Sept 06, 04:21:00 pm GMT-6
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