LORD Please send angels, physical ones and spiritual ones!
I am so tired! It feels as if I have been in labor for 6 days. How many women can do that? With my second daughter, I was in labor for 3 weeks straight. She was 2 months premature and they had IV medicine going into both arms trying to stop her from coming too early. That was VERY hard, but I did not have to push her out every couple of hours, like this illness is acting like. Every few hours I push uncontrollably as if I am giving birth to a baby or to some part of my body. Too weak to even shower or bath or change clothes or think or get something to eat or talk on the phone or to think of a solution. I just lay here and pray and listen to the TV to try to get my mind off the pain. Too weak to go get medical help. Have no one here to help me, my mother is upstairs very sick too. She needs to go to the Dr. in 12 hours and I have to think of how to get her there because I can't take her. There is no way to explain how tired pneumonia makes a person, and how tired childbirth makes a person, and I am experiencing it many times a day. Lupus has almost the same degree of fatigue...and I'm running out of adrenaline to keep pushing myself on. My brother is having what seems like a nervous breakdown and I am too weak to even understand his feelings or to encourage him. I always thought God made me his sister so that I could help him with his heavy weight in life, and I have failed him too. I am useless most of the time. I feel half dead. I want to go "home" if this is how life will be. You are not "living" unless you can be "doing" something. This is not life. It took me an hour to write this. I hope the saying is true that says "It's always darkest just before the dawn". That would mean that things will turn around soon. Depression stinks! Please don't tell me to just snap out of it or just cheer up. Things like that do not work when a person is too weak to breathe or eat or change clothes for days. Too tired to know what to pray for, so I will ask the Holy Spirit to pray for me. I'd cry if I had more strength.
Blessings...
whoever I am. lol
Hi Dear Sheila!
My heart is broken and I am so sorry that you are in such a big pain. I know that you are so tired.
But Please, never lose your hope.
As you, I call to God too
LORD Please send angels, physical ones and spiritual ones to my dear Sheila!
You are always in my thoughts and prayers.
Love and hugs to you!
krystyna said... Wed Dec 17, 04:19:00 am GMT-7
sheila, i wish i could help you but i'm so far away. know that i'm praying for you always. (((HUGS)))
Anonymous said... Wed Dec 17, 07:49:00 pm GMT-7
My name is Sarah. I saw the link to your blog at livingwithtn.
My heart and prayers are with you.
Sarah
Anonymous said... Thu Dec 18, 10:14:00 am GMT-7
THANK YOU ANGELS PIA & KRYSTYNA!
hi Sarah! So nice to meet you! TY & I hope to get to know you better. It will be nice to have a friend that understands TN-aka suicide disease. In livingwthtn does it show where we can email each other or send messages to each other? Have a good day and Merry Christmas!
Bluebirdy/Sheila
Bluebirdy said... Thu Dec 18, 02:04:00 pm GMT-7
Hi Sheila--Sending you love and healing energy as always--keep posting, even if it's grim news, your strength to keep writing is an inspiration! Hope you got my email...
Yes said... Fri Dec 19, 06:56:00 pm GMT-7
just write what you need, bluebirdy. don't worry if they sound depressing from time to time. heck, who can sound cheerful going through this.
we are here for you. that's the least we could do. it's so tough what you and your mom is going through. i wish there is a support group that can come to your place from time to time, or to assist you/mom when you need medical assistance. there should be something like that in an advance country like yours. or a religious group. anything. it's really hard to get by with two sick people in the house who can only depend on each other.
and yes, do believe in your angels. they are powerful beings. life is such a mystery. it's hard to comprehend many things.
keep as strong as you can. we are all here for you, though really far away. but in prayers we can bridge the distance. *hugs*
mistipurple said... Sat Dec 20, 11:16:00 am GMT-7
Hi Shiela,
I will re-post this to solicit prayers for you. We will bombard heaven's gate with prayers. Lord please send somebody to minister to the physical needs of Shiela, her mother and her brother. All of them are very sick. Lord I know nothing is impossible with you. Please send your angels to minister to Shiela and a godly person to help them in their everyday needs. Please take care of their financial needs too. I know you will bless them tremendously for all their needs. This I pray to You Father, in the mighty name of Jesus, through the ministry of the Holy Spirit, one God forever and ever. Amen. Hang on my sister. Help is on the way. Merry Christmas and a Prosperous New Year to you and your loved ones. God bless you always. BTW, I will make an emergency repost of this post at my Random Thoughts blog after I leave here.
Mel Avila Alarilla said... Sat Dec 20, 02:35:00 pm GMT-7
Hello Shiela, got here from Me Avila's blog. I can't help you physically but hope prayers will do. Our prayers will be yours and your family today, tomorrow and days to come. Please don't lose hope and keep your faith strong. God won't give the situation to you if you can't handle it... I hope that you, Mom, and brother will feel better soon...
Chubskulit Rose said... Sat Dec 20, 03:36:00 pm GMT-7
The loving Lord has sent me the jewels of the earth as friends! I thank you deeply, those who left comments and those who just prayed for me without leaving a comment. Mel, I think it's very eery that almost 100% of the time, when you leave a comment, it is the same time I am creating another post, and it gets posted just shortly after you left your comment.
Chubskulit, so nice to meet you and have you as a new friend.
I had another devastation. Satan is really trying to knock me down when I am already too wiped out to get up. After weeks of sleeping 1 hour each night,not eating, but only drinking, and in unbearable pain from kidney stone and infection in kidneys and lungs, Satan convinced my daughter to give me an early Christmas gift of a hate letter. It has really hurt me, but in a way, it is good that she wrote it, so that I can explain to her the real truth, not the false ideas that she has had all these years. Maybe it will be a chance to get closer. (I hope and pray.)Thanks again. What precious people the Lord has sent to me!
Sheila/Bluebirdy
Bluebirdy said... Sat Dec 20, 05:59:00 pm GMT-7
Hi Mel!
You are the real man!
God bless you!
God bless you Sheila!
krystyna said... Sat Dec 20, 08:49:00 pm GMT-7
Get well soon dear.Take care.God Bless You!
Sameera Ansari said... Sun Dec 21, 04:34:00 pm GMT-7
My Dearest Sheila,
I feel so helpless not being close enough to come take care of your physical needs. I join with your other friends in praying our Father in Heaven on your behalf. You are such a loving, faithful friend, and even when you are enduring so much you pray for me and my needs! I love you and am so blessed to have you as a friend these 10 years. Love you sis...hugs SaraSmile1024
Anonymous said... Sun Dec 21, 11:13:00 pm GMT-7
Hello
Merry Chrismas to you
~PakKaramu~ said... Mon Dec 22, 09:47:00 am GMT-7
Hi Bluebirdy,
I read about you at Mel's Random Thoughts blog. He is certainly one of the "good guys."
My prayer for you:
Dear God, Creator of all that is, I call upon you today to have mercy on Bluebirdy. Fill her with your healing power, your divine love and and supernatural presence. I speak healing to every fiber of her being, knowing that you are the great Healer. Sanctify her home and protect her from intrusion, interception, and detours from the evil one. Help her to stand with your armor, ready to live this gift of life to the fullest with your loving help. Send her the help and helpers she needs to get through this difficult time. In Jesus name and for Your glory, Amen.
Bluebirdy, keep crying out to God, my friend. Keep knocking on the door. Do not stop, do not feel guilty for asking for help from God, that is a trick of the evil one to keep you isolated in your time of need. Stand before Him with a grateful heart, and then receive with a grateful heart. Bless your home... go through and pray in each room, displacing all negativity with the love and light of God. Let go of emotional traumas, just give them to God so you can be free. Do not let others rob you of your joy. You can listen without "absorbing" them into your being. Mentally dismiss their negative words. Absorb the Holy Spirit Joy instead. Do these things things in the name of Jesus and for God's glory.
Anonymous said... Mon Dec 22, 01:26:00 pm GMT-7
THANKYOU EVERYONE, and Thank you Sandra. Mel certainly is a jewel, isn't he? It takes one to know one, so you must be one too, as are the dear spiritual friends that I have met through him. Bless you! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
Bluebirdy said... Mon Dec 22, 01:51:00 pm GMT-7
I want you to know that today I am praying for you and giving your name to a 3500 member prayer group with serious prayer warriors. He is beside you and holding you hand.
Sending you love my new friend,
Lynn
Unknown said... Wed Dec 24, 04:07:00 am GMT-7
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